he compared it to being held under water for a long time and now that i'm above i'm gasping for breath. i have to say i concur.

FML.

ugh.

i need to calm the fuck down. Freaking myself out helps nothing.
i should stop worrying about the things i can't control.
-M

me and my fucking insecurities.
i can never just let myself be.
if something happens
i have to over think over analyze over talk over everything.
i hate myself for being so weird about everything
i admire the people that can just let go and let things be
no worries..
i strive for that..
my stomach and heart are spinning.
-M.

shit i haven't posted in a while

school is going well.
a little bizarre but i am making new friends..
although learning a bunch of new names isn't easy
um..
adam
adriana
alexis
nick
carmine
allen
christy
tyler
samantha
stephany
those are all the ones that are out of class
in class there is
kevin
frank
justin
matt
bianca
and bunch others but i thought i'd just name the ones i've hung out with..
anyways
i'm so sick of baking already and i'm sick of people saying that they thought that i'd go into that..
ugh.
please don't presume to know me or who i am if we hardly speak.
reber i heard your home i'm gonna call or text or write you soon..
i miss all of zee homies.
and i know it's kind of an either/or type thing right now which sucks but i get it.
anyways.
if you don't have a facebook you should i've met some school friends via it. and posted a bunch of my culinary creations..
today i went w/manuel to legg lake to get rid of a lot of my stale baking products which was beyond fun..
other than that i'm gonna call it a day.
-M

bizarre foods contest.

Wow i sucked.
the 7 courses were:
1.Braised Pig Stomach
2.Duck Blood Soup
3.Chicken Feet
4.Cows Uterus
5.Lamb and Rooster Testicles
6.Durian
7.Balut
any guesses how far i got?..
i did fail by the way.. epically..
i only got to the chicken feet..
i wanna puke just thinking of it..
it wasn't that the meat/skin tasted bad it was the cracking of the bones in the feet and the nails on each toe..oye.. and beyond that even if i thought i would finish that course they had started serving the uterus and there was no fucking way.
i looked at it and wanted to cry and nearly did when i saw the balut..
btw: balut is a fertilized duck egg with a well developed fetus inside i nearly choked on my sadness while watching people eat it.
and p.s. though durian smells so god awful that i wouldn't dare put it in my mouth...
but i will say the stomach was actually quite tasty..
but i had to gag the duck blood soup down..oh my poor stomach..